Hope... I'm not sure if I like you so much right now.
Are you there to uplift? Or to dash dreams to bits?
I'm struggling with hope, folks. But I know hope keeps me (us) going? If it wasn't in my (our) lives, why the devil would I (we) get out of bed in the morning?
When I hope it seems that my heart gets broken. Perhaps I need to lower my expectations, but when I really want something, I WANT it and my heart gets attached so quickly, to my ultimate downfall.
Over a month ago, I mentioned I went on a date that I thought wouldn't go any farther than the driveway. Well, low and behold, I was asked on a second date by the guy I really liked. This date went AMAZING! But now the man of my dreams (ok, that's taking it too far) is all distant, even after expressing he likes me. I'm pretty sure (this time) the date will go no farther than the front door. Blast!
So, I guess this is why I'm dealing with a love/hate relationship with hope.
Where is the line that hope is healthy? I don't know. Do you?
However, I have a set of my scriptures lying on the end table by my bed. It just so happens to be open to a quote I wrote on the back of the front cover. It says:
"Hope in the evidence of faith."
That quote has never hit me so hard as it did now. My faith in a lot of things has been waning. A lot. But mostly in myself. Anything that may go wrong in my life comes back to the I'm not good enough blah blah blah. Low confidence much? Yup.
But this quote clicked with me more than it has ever done. Because I hope for good things in my life (ie: a boyfriend turn husband, children, a traditional publisher, travel to every continent, etc.), it means I have faith. I have faith in myself because I hope for many things. I have faith in good outcomes, whenever they may arrive in my life.
I have hope and that is a good thing!
What are your thoughts about hope?
Hugs
Writing Jewels
